I want to start with something that took me a long time to understand: eating disorders are not about food. I know that sounds like exactly the wrong place to begin an article about eating disorders, but stick with me, because I think this single misunderstanding is responsible for the majority of harm compared to anything else surrounding this topic. We talk about eating disorders like they are dietary problems that got out of hand. It makes it sound like someone went on a d

The shell that surrounds me Is contained of sweetened cafe drinks It is contained of birthday parties And celebration How it is now defines me More than how it used to be It used to be terrifying And cold The warmth of life was never felt My shell was injected With empty and tasteless meals This is not how I know myself This was not who I am How it is now Was never a destination It is just me I just had to figure out what that meant Before I was able to be warm

The weight lies in the mind Not the body Like a gray storm thundering across Disrupting everything in its path The storm inside The brain thinks the body imperfect But it cruelly plays tricks on itself A magician It imagines a pretend reality As the eyes scour for these make-believe imperfections As if finding treasure on the island But the X is an illusion A trap It makes comparison to others Wishing it were others Trying to appear like others Still At what price must the br